AlpineValleyGirl
I just got into a huge fight with a bitch at work yesterday
after she started going off on another co-worker who had done nothing wrong
except make the bitch look bad because she doesn't do her job and blames everyone else for it

I stepped up to the bitch and let her know exactly what I think of her
and she kept saying,  "I ain't afraid of you!"
and I kept saying, "you should be."  then she starts telling me how to do MY job
and how she's going to get me fired.  all I had to say to her was,
"I've been here 24 years and you've been here 8 months.  Guess who's going to win?"

I made her cry.  today she has submitted her two weeks notice.
the other co-worker knelt down in front of me and can't stop thanking me.
Helping My Boss Find His Own Ass with Both Hands since 1986!
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Gnomez
But I am afraid of you.....
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Tiger479
Gnomez wrote:

But I am afraid of you.....


So am I, wow I thought I had some work anger built up 
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The_post_modern_sadist
most people at work leave me alone and I get along with almost everyone. but there is a few people whom I would not mind just taking a massive shit in their gas tank. or just shit all over their windshield or something.

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Gnomez
Same....I get on with pretty much everyone at work (just a couple I can't be bothered with)...we have a mufti day at work on Friday...I'm thinking of wearing a chicken suit just to add some humour to an otherwise dull work day
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Tiger479
You should shit in her chair at work.
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Gnomez

That' hardly be very discreet or anonymous....
Hiding shelfish under the seat in her car is a great trick
It slowly goes off and the stench gets worse and worse and they can't find what it is or where on earth it's coming from
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AlpineValleyGirl
Gnomez wrote:


That' hardly be very discreet or anonymous....
Hiding shelfish under the seat in her car is a great trick
It slowly goes off and the stench gets worse and worse and they can't find what it is or where on earth it's coming from


when my niece moved out of their house in Las Vegas last July
(after the bank screwed them over for a year with re-fi and short sale BS)
they opened a can of Spam and placed it inside a heating duct

they often wonder if anyone has found it yet
Helping My Boss Find His Own Ass with Both Hands since 1986!
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AlpineValleyGirl
UPDATE;  the bitch crawled right up the boss' ass and talked him into taking her back
she came to me last week, all apologies and shit, acting like she's the victim in all of this
the rest of us have a few things planned for her when she comes back to work this week

nothing discreet or anonymous, just outright hostility
Helping My Boss Find His Own Ass with Both Hands since 1986!
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Gnomez
AVG you need to be the better person, bury the hatchet (figuratively speaking), and turn the other cheek
I think when she turns up at work you should run up to her with arms out open, give her a hug, tell her you both made mistakes, suggest you start afresh and on a clean slate, and let's be friends

* gnomez ducks his head and runs for it *
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Tiger479
theres some good laxative stuff you can put in her coffee , I forget the name
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AlpineValleyGirl
so, I was called in to work early by the GM
and I get to my private office, which is connected to my boss' part of the building
nobody knew I was there yet and I heard her bitching her head off about me to the boss
twisting things I had said and accusing me of things I never did
so I very quietly opened the connecting door and leaned up against the doorframe behind her
and the boss saw me and knew she hadn't yet and he yelled back at her,
"ont hold back, tell me what you really think of her!"
so she started going off and as she looked away, he looked over at me and winked 
and after she really got going she turned around and saw me

now I know what apoplexy looks like                                     

she was struck dumb, doing that 'oh no you didn't' dance and then she ran away and didn't come back
she was leaving for the day anyways, having adjusted her schedule to be there when I'm not.

my boss and I couldn't stop laughing about that the whole day, giving eachother this face  and cracking up
Helping My Boss Find His Own Ass with Both Hands since 1986!
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Tiger479
sounds like some drama my wife used to have at her work. Someone was saying untrue things to get my wife in trouble but when they called her out on it she changed her story. Since everybody knew she was full of crap she ended up quiting. 
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AlpineValleyGirl
THE EPILOGUE;

she gave her notice over the weekend
she crammed her shit all into a box
she moved out quite early this morning
and this afternoon, I changed all the locks!

{dancing around in my office with my handy Phillips screwdriver in hand}
Helping My Boss Find His Own Ass with Both Hands since 1986!
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Gnomez
You still should have punched her out
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